At home in many dimensions
BecomingEssence has emerged from a life path, a life path with many unanswerable questions. Right into the ambivalence of being! To be thrown into the world as a human being, a place that is chaotic and inhospitable from the soul’s point of view, equipped with a finer perception and feeling, was actually more than I could bear.
Many things simply did not make sense. Being here definitely meant a task. To accept it or to leave again? I am glad that I decided to stay. In order to live my “Mission To Earth”, I had to rise above myself not only once. On my adventurous journey, I couldn’t leave out the spiritual dimension of our humanity.
Trauma Expert, Shame researcher, process-facilitator
Ann La-Forker is at home in many dimensions. The humanities scholar also worked for many years as a project manager in the business world. Today the multi-facetted bodywork psychotherapist accompanies individuals and companies with her process work. She has also remained a passionate researcher.
She sums up her approach with a smile with the words “spiritual growing meets grounded nervous system”. In her process work, she combines a clear understanding of the world with shamanic knowledge and profound know-how about “trauma as an opportunity”.
Born in the shadow of post-war Germany in the DDR, the pearl diver has always lived in the clear self-perception of a “global citizen”. The discovery of the influence of transgenerational trauma and collective shadows on her own life was for her the key to a liberated life. In order to make this possible for other people, she trained herself over many years to become a holistic expert across a range of sectors.
Unwavering, she continues to research the essential conditions for a good life for all. In her projects – both in a regional and global context – she stands for the basic value of human dignity.
Ann lives with her family in Staufen, in the very south of Germany, close to Switzerland and France. Her energy flows into her bodywork therapy practice RAUM IM SEIN and into the Becoming-Essence Feel & Think Tank.
She regularly publishes articles on her main research topics trauma, shame and the conditions for a live in integrity. She is available as an interview partner and initiator at events and worldwide conferences for this topics.
Sande-Ann Maila is her shamanic name.
Mahalo for sharing your delicious
nourishing magic, Sande-Ann!
My heart still sings of joy to hear and see you share in your soft loving beauty.
Come back of the soul
My “mission to earth”
From soul to soul: I enjoy working in the special depth that is possible in 1:1 coaching. Top down and bottom up – unseen the position and the power we hold, there is a basic human right to soul.integrity. A right to be heard with our passion and the deeper values we are standing for.
Both is needed, the changes coming “from below” and the changes coming “from above”. I love the smart and clever ideas of small start-ups and the private community engagement offering fast prototyping for the new. And if something can shift in a big decision maker in politics and business this is also a powerful leverage for change.
Both sides are coming closer – until we all meet in our “mission to earth”. This is the process I want to be of support. Below I am sharing with you about my path to my own souls mission.
Ann La-Forker, Januar 2022
coming out of an introvert
My deep questions about human existence have accompanied me since my first breath.
I experienced birth and death in the same moment: my near-death experience of hour 0 made me look towards death for a few moments – today I would say I have seen God.
Where am I, anyway?
Born in 1975 in the GDR, as an introverted child I explored the borderland mainly in my inner dream world. The first years in society were difficult. Shy, often not belonging to it or simply underchallenged and therefore overstrained.
I couldn’t do anything with the socialist organizations and became an outsider. A role that on the other hand gave me a lot of freedom. Even as a child I saw myself simply as a human and found my home in deep “friendships for life”.
The carefree Baltic Sea holidays were the resource of my childhood. My parents were fully absorbed in their professions. Here we finally had time together. Playing canasta, concerts, readings – even free thinking intellectuals met up here in the summer, society is felt and thought of in a new way here. We talk a lot. And I took in a lot. You can remain honest with your values even under adverse circumstances. That’s how I grew up in a country with a strong ideology to be a free minded and independent person.
everything is different
At the age of 15 the Berlin wall came down. And with it came many opportunities. More serious for me was the break up of my family. My parents are getting divorced.
And I wake up to my voice in the world. Demonstrating against the Iraq war, commitment against nuclear power. I move into a squat. And I continue to ask myself the important questions: How am I getting along with humanity as such. Why did I end up here? Can I leave again? Questioning everything. Questioning God.
Widening the limits
On search around the world
With the fall of the Berlin Wall, I have also expanded my own boundaries. Those inside and outside.
At first I approached the subject of being human academically. I studied Romance languages, philosophy and medieval history. Not yet arrived.
Then international cultural management, studies in France. Project management at international cultural institutions at home and abroad. Teaching in Asia and Africa.
My longterm relationship breaks up. And I almost too. Dresden as a safe place to live as home is gone for a long time. I flee. My mother keeps the connection.
Fleeing takes me far away! America, New Orleans – rebuilding after Hurricane Katrina and standing up for human dignity. Being lost myself and then gathering with people who have also just been badly affected. A heartfelt connection – a special experience that I want to write home about. Without further ado I became a journalist … New Orleans – the city with the two faces >
Back in Germany again the attempt to find my way into a “normal” life.
New start – from 0
Between public relations and relationship work
You cannot go back – so make new connections! I decide to move to Hamburg and help build up the Reeperbahn Music Festival from scratch. A heart project in a great team with a wide range of experiences: Head of Public Relations & Cooperations, Curator, Project Manager. Pioneering work. Building up structures, creating sustainable connections, trying out new forms of teamwork, a lot of relationship work.
At the same time, I am clearing up the past. Dealing with the separation, discovering body-orientated psychotherapy, doing further training, deepening friendships, travelling, living alone. I like to be in the here and now.
After 8 years I am reaching my limits in terms of my profession. Something else calls. And it’s hard to let go. Severe pain forces me to make another decision.
A long journey
to the core
I wanted to take the deepest and most honest path to the core and origin, the essence of being human. All in all, many years of training: Existential Analysis, Gestalt and Bodywork Psychotherapy are followed by modern mysticism and trauma release. Continuing with the exploration of human vulnerability. A good life for all – how does that work? How do relationships succeed? How do we live our connection to God today?
Again and again the retreat into nature. I am sent alone on an inner journey and accept the invitation. Experience the limits of human existence – and learn to be present. Awakening the access to the dream-time and preparing the shamanic initiation on a Hawaiian journey some years later.
Without an outer
but to arrive at last
I knew: to land completely, to get involved in life without a net or a solid ground – this is only possible with a radical orientation towards the nature of my being.
What am I really interested in? What does it take to be fully engaged in what I want to accomplish? How do I shape my life in such a way that I can also easily deal with the many impressions of my fine sensory system and the strong inner movements?
My declaration of love to our human nature has become unbreakable. I am a passionate researcher and simply want to know. I take the step into independence.
The bliss and the trials
It is nature that draws me to the south of Germany for the step into self-employment. Coincidence that shortly afterwards “down here” I meet my husband for life, with whom I can learn great love and develop joint projects? Liveliness and abundance and therefore also a lot of challenges are given from now on. The wonderful madness of a patchwork family with strong characters forces me to fill up my fine and introverted side more and more with steadfastness and clarity.
As a trauma therapist I am fully committed to my work. In exploring my own essence I have found the answers to many of my questions. And with it the point where I can turn things around. Going deep with people, helping them find their truth, their essence, their pearl. As a pearl diver I can best contribute to creating a better, more just world.
And bring brighter colours into the world.
Working with the essence
I am still considering myself to be rather introvert. But that shouldn’t hinder me to also show up as an activist f- or humanity, for the planet, for our future. With the combination of trauma therapy and consulting for large companies in politics and business I have finally arrived, addressing in my sessions the real questions: Where did we lose contact with ourselves and with nature? How can it be that people collapse under the burden of their own lives, that politicians make decisions hostile to life, that many things die and we stand by unmoved, that some companies have become a place lacking humanity and others a guarantee for burn-out? We can only find the answer by looking back from the problems to ourselves. What is it that actually makes us human?
A call to action!
Our off-track way of living is causing us much inner and outer wounding. Many gifted people in our society are professionally taking care of these wounds through their highly committed work. People with a deep knowing about our human nature and the conditions needed for us and life to flourish. Often they are visionaries – without a mandate, because their contribution has been reduced to serve as “firefighters” in a self-destructive world.
An uncomfortable question bothers me: Can I stay loyal to my professional integrity, whilst at the same time being involved in social structures which dis-esteem and violate my core values? Am I not, in doing so, a servant of the very structures I don’t agree with? I am coming to a point where I can no longer just “give” my healing work into that context of “wrongness”. To reestablish integrity in my life I have to speak up for the value of integrity itself. Walking my talk in making my dilemma public, encouraging others to become advocates for their soul’s integrity too – for the sake of the integrity of the whole. Integrity For Future is born.
embrace the ambivalence of life
My father, Helmut.
Mediator and unconventional thinker.
Parish priest and rebel.
I challenge you very much with my deep inner worlds and my strong emotional connection to life. Thank you, with all the challenges and break-ups you stay in touch with your fatherly love for me.
I love you.
And I bow to you.
My mother, Maria.
System-critical intelligent free and peaceful spirit.
With heart and soul amongst the people. As a doctor and simply so.
We are so closely connected that it’s painful when I push you to your limits. Thank you, you have courageously looked at your own history and worked through the trauma of the generations before you, so that our relationship can be free.
I love you.
And I bow to you.
& sometimes cheeky
Family bliss at Baltic Sea
Separated for too long
& happy back together
to the moon
to the 3 of us
a young doctor – open to the world
Thinking society new
I must have known somehow
Give me the world!
Fear turns into the biggest love!
Academic: M.A. Germanic Studies, Romance Studies, History | Master of Arts in Social Science & Humanities | Master Science Politique
In the Marketplace: Project management in international cultural institutions in Germany and abroad
Head of Public Relations & Co-operations, Curator of Arts Programme, Reeperbahn Festival Hamburg
Currently: Festival Designer, Water Festival Freiburg
As an Independent: Founder of RAUM IM SEIN, practice for trauma resolution and bonding-oriented body psychotherapy
Free Play & Research: Founder of Becoming-Essence Feel & Think Tank and the global initiative Integrity For Future
Participation: > Collective Trauma – Climate Change Lab of the Pocket Project/
> Prototyping in the program u.lab 2x 2021
- Master Stratégies des Echanges
- Magistra Artium Germanic and Romance Studies, History
- Somatic Experiencing Practitioner®
based on Peter Levine
- Existential Analysis based on Viktor Frankl
- Gestalt-Counsellor based on Fritz Perls
- Body Psychotherapy based on Wilhelm Reich
- Basic Bonding© based on Thomas Harms
- Academy of Inner Science | Transparent communication
based on Thomas Huebl
- Masterclass Coma and near death experiences by Peter Levine